If....

If I was a month, I would be October.

If I was a day, oh wait....I was! I mean, I am!

If I was an emotion, I would be brevity.

If I was a direction, I would be due South.

If I was a song, I would be "Ain't Life Grand" by Widespread Panic.

If I was a mood, I would be tranquil.

If I was a color, I would be yellow.

If I was a tree, I would be a pecan.

If I was a tool, I would be a cute broom. With a sparkly dust pan.

If I was a car, I would be a Pathfinder. Or a Volvo if it's Sunday.

If I was a fruit, I would be a grape. Why you ask? Cause grapes go good with everything!

If I was weather, I would be sunshiney.

If I was a season, I would be Spring. Yes I know it conflicts with my month, but just go with it ya'll!

If I was a place, I would be a dock on a bay house along the Gulf Coast.

If I was a food, I would be a fish taco.

If I was a dog, I would be a Lois.

If I was a house, I would be a white-washed beach cottage.

If I was a store, I would be Anthropologie.

The Fellowship of Football

The weather is still hot as blue blazes outside, but I have Fall on the brain! Fall is my absolute favorite time of year. I love the crisp, cool mornings and the beautiful colors of the leaves. I love that my unruly curly hair finally catches a break from all this humidity. People are nicer once the thermometer drops below 80. Outdoor activities even become enjoyable rather than oppressive and unbearable. Overall, there really isn't much of anything I don't like about Fall.

Every year about this time the college football countdown begins. H is beside himself with excitement, even though his favorite college team won the National Championship and his favorite NFL team won the Super Bowl last year. Apparently when all your football dreams come true in one year, all it does is make you hope it happens consecutively. His excitement is cute, and it tends to be contagious. He starts looking for a new hat. He starts tuning in to ESPN practice coverage. He even starts preparing our Football Game-Watching Schedule.

And that is where I come in!

I may not know a tight end from a cornerback or a shoulder pad from an athletic cup (hehe, okay I DO know the difference on that one!), but I do know how to throw a football party! I love football season simply because I love any excuse to host/attend/plan a shindig. There is nothing better than getting a few friends together to watch the game, have a few cocktails, and eat yummy dips and finger foods!

While Harris is busy checking out the opponents' stats and info, I am busy making dips and cleaning the house. Windows and doors are opened so the smell of grills can mingle with the air of excitement. Both men and women spend just a few extra minutes picking the perfect game-day attire. Coolers are washed out and we all contribute a little bit more to the beer economy. Each guest will inevitably bring a dish--simply because that's how it's done in the South. There is always a lot of laughter, food, and libations. At the end of the evening, even the losers tend to go home happy. Or at least full.

Happy Football Fellowship to you all! May your team charge to victory and may God give them wings on their cleats! (Unless your favorite team is playing my favorite team, in which case scratch all of that!)

Geaux Saints! War Damn Eagle! And last but not least....Go Trojans!

Ode to H

I hate blogs that brag on and on about how wonderful life is. It kind of makes me throw up in my mouth because I know darn good and well that life isn't always butterflies and chocolate heart-shaped candies. The real world is not so nice--it's full of bills. And let me tell you, if you're not familiar with bills, they SUCK. I wasn't really familiar with bills until I graduated college, and then life served me a big 'ol plate of hot, steamin' reality. It was terrible, and it certainly didn't taste like chicken.

I got a job, got married, bought a house....all the things a young adult is supposed to do. And even though there have been a few road blocks in our professional lives throughout the past few years, things are finally starting to fall together. (I hope, at least! If you're superstitious type, now would be the time to knock on wood or rub your lucky rabbit's foot for me!)

Thankfully the past has taught me some VERY valuable lessons. Albeit, ones that I sometimes wished I could have learned by watching them happen to someone else, but that wasn't God's plan. After the bumps along the road, it makes me even happier that I have H as the ultimate partner-in-crime.

He doesn't shower me with flowers and surprises. Getting him to take out the trash without being told is a miracle. He can't close a cabinet door to save his life, and sometimes I have to remind him to clip his toenails. But he cleans up good....


And he makes me laugh, which is much more powerful than gold in my book. He gets my jokes and my sick sense of humor. He let me adopt a mutt. He thinks a big booty is sexy. He loves my friends. Most of all--He loves me.

In my life there is no such thing as perfect. Dirty clothes are always piled up, there is dog hair on my floor, and there is always another bill. In my life, the only surprises I get from my husband usually involve some degree of nudity (see The Pants Game).

And overall, I'm blessed beyond compare and wouldn't trade him for anything in the world.

Happy Birthday Nana!

Thursday, August 5th, 2010 marked the 90th birthday of H's grandmother. So on Saturday we gave her what all 90-year-old women truly want--a drunken party!

Okay, okay, we didn't really throw her a drunken party, you got me! We did, however, throw her a tasteful, delightful, completely appropriate birthday party suitable for a classy dame like Nana. As much as I would like to, I can't take all the credit. I really shouldn't even take part of the credit, but I'm an only child that loves personal recognition and praise--but at least I'm honest about it.

For a brief recap, the party was last Saturday at the home of some family friends. Somerby, Nana's very posh and upscale retirement community, unloaded a bus-load of senior citizens like an eager mom dropping her brood at daycare for the afternoon. And trust me when I tell you this group was ready to party!

Nana is one of the most amazing women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Not to sell my own grandmothers short (because they are pretty awesome themselves) but this post is about Nana's birthday so I shall honor her today. Her husband, H's grandfather, died twenty-something years ago. After his passing, Nana decided there was just no time like the present to really start living her life---so she packed a bag and took off looking for adventure. Beginning in her early sixties after Pop's death, Nana decided to travel the world--usually unaccompanied. Now some people might balk at that thought, but I think it sounds divine. She just went where she wanted to go and did what she wanted to do. There are pictures of her in well-known spots like Italy and London, Brazil and Japan. And there are some pictures of Nana in even more exotic locales--the pyramids of Egypt, a fish market in Thailand, on safari in Africa. Even at 90, she is ready to head out of here on the next thing smoking! (I'm not sure, but she may even have a bag packed in her hall closet--just in case.)

At my bridesmaid brunch the morning of my wedding, Nana gave a beautiful Irish toast that I will treasure forever. I felt it was a true welcoming into her clan--straight from the matriach and head of the family. It was on that day that I decided to be more like Nana. Embrace the adventure of the unknown! Don't be afraid to do something you've always wanted to do--even if it means doing it alone sometimes. Most of all, handle things with grace and confidence, and never let 'em see ya sweat. Last but not least, try to collect odds and ends from around the world that you can one day pass along to your grandson (and his lovely wife)--which is how we acquired a wooden carving of a big hand flipping someone the bird.

Last Saturday was one of those experiences where you set out to do something nice for someone else, then you realize in the end that you were the one that was truly blessed. My email-forwarding, digital camera-loving, twistedly humorous Nana-in-law did have a wonderful time celebrating with family and friends. She even shook her groove thang with an awfully handsome and dapper older gentleman.

And somewhere....deep down.....I crossed my fingers that their bus trip home was as wild and crazy as any Spring Break Party Bus rental in PCB ever thought about being!

Minus the stripper pole---she is our Nana for Pete's sake!

The Past Week

The past few weeks have been pretty hectic. Here is a brief glimpse at what my previous week has been like:

First off--I'm still remodeling and renovating the suite upstairs, and I must say it is coming along rather nicely. Just like I figured, I am immensely proud of my hard work! Actually, my pride could be considered a little annoying because I will show anyone my project if they show the faintest hint of interest! Seriously, I would invite Ted Bundy in for a look-see if I caught him strolling down North Reed. It isn't quite ready for pics yet, though. :( My wonderfully talented neighbor, Tall Paul, has also clued me in a spot where I can "find" some "discarded" hardwood flooring--but more to come on that once I figure out if I actually have the testicular fortitude to carry out the "midnight requisition" this plan requires.

Last weekend the puppers and I made a quick trip to K-town for a family reunion. H couldn't attend because he works too much. :( My family is beginning to think I just paid someone to play my husband at our wedding as an excuse to have a party. Like most things in life, there were some high points and a few low points over the weekend. Let's start with the high, shall we? It was wonderful seeing some of my family members I haven't seen in a while. This was the Reeves Reunion, which is my paternal grandmother's family and let me tell you one thing: Don't drink the water around this clan!!! I swear to goodness there were 50 bajillion kids running around. If they could all decide on a leader and rally together they would overtake the adults in a second! Kids aren't really my specialty, but overall it was nice. All of the kids are adorable (I mean, hello...with this gene pool? How could they NOT be?) but it is a little overwhelming for me, being an only child and a non-babysitting teenager. My dogs absolutely love the country so their weekend was especially nice. They take full advantage of the big yard, pond, pool, and donkeys. And our Lab, Charlie aka "Chuck", has a deep obsession with my dad that borders on pitiful. My dad's demeanor is so calm and soothing our weirdo, sketch-ball dog just loves him! My dad will walk around doing chores and "piddlin" and Chuck just follows him with adoring eyes--it's cute. I think he really misses H since he's been off working.

The low point is barely worth mentioning, but I will anyway because it's kinda funny how my mom sold me out. Even though some of my family rented this HUGE RV for the trip to Alabama from Central Florida, they somehow still ended up in my room and I ended up on the couch. All that mobile space and only my cousin and her 2 year-old slept in the dang thing! Apparently my mom didn't think this little tidbit of information was worth mentioning until I was 2 minutes away from their house. But...the joke was on them because the RV was parked smack dab in the middle of their front yard, hooked up to an electrical outlet in the garage! Overall, no harm done--my back is still young enough to take a night on the sofa and it was worth it to see the fam!

H's grandmother's 90th birthday is this Saturday! I am in the midst of losing my mind since a lot of the responsibility got thrown on me at the last possible second. I did the invitations a few weeks ago so I thought my main contribution was over, but I was mistaken. Every spare moment is spent pulling everything together in time for the bash. But in all honesty, I'm happy to do it. Nana is one of the coolest women I've ever met and I'm honored to be able to participate in a party that celebrates her. I think my next post will be an homage to Nana so all two of you can learn a little more about her!

Obsession

I am constantly amazed at the crap that's on television. I call it "crap" because most of it is so ridiculous and mind-numbing even I can't believe I watch it. But watch it I do! And on top of that, I could spend hours commenting and discussing the lives of these people that I only know through the comfort of my flat screen. It is a disease! A drug! An addiction!

And I love it.

My must-see TV is generally focused on Bravo. I am a sucker for any type of reality show that doesn't revolve around singing, dancing, surviving, racing, raising sextuplets, or really any sort of talent at all. I prefer the good 'ol fashioned reality shows about absolutely nothing. I guess this can be traced to the fact that I'm not really talented enough to make a show like American Idol, and I'm certainly not fit enough to do something like Survivor. But thankfully I can down a cocktail and be entertaining!

Case in point: The Real Housewives of _________________ (insert random US city here)

Currently I am enthralled with TRH of New Jersey. Those chicks crack me up! First of all, we have Danielle, who (allegedly) used to be high-class (and I use that word loosely, no pun intended) call girl and might have helped someone kidnap someone in the past. I am a little frightened by this botoxed nutjob, but I must admit I wouldn't mind drinking some wine on her porch! Jacqueline is pretty normal as far as reality show stars go, but her daughter needs a serious attitude adjustment. I'm not a mom, but I can promise you my kid won't be talking to me like that and driving a brand-new Range Rover. Theresa is my fave--I love the relationship she and her hubby have. She always tries to sound intelligent by using big words and cliches but usually ends up saying something like "pot calling the kettle old." Caroline is the mama, and offers great advice from the safety of her kitchen. Her family seems like one that I would like to be friends with. They even play the "Ham Game" which is where they throw ham at each other when the other person leasts expects it. We play "The Pants Game" at my house which thankfully does not involve ham at all, but I'm thinking maybe H and I should add this to our list of ways to drive each other insane.

For some reason it seems like I'm forgetting someone, but I guess if you're on a reality show and nobody remembers you, you're probably not worth mentioning at all.

Why oh why can't Bravo come calling for "The Real Housewives of Mobile"!? Idon't have a huge house or an unlimited budget, which may be the only two requirements to be on a reality show. Now that I think about it, no one would really be interested in a show about me buying dishwashing liquid at the Dollar General. Or getting the oil changed in my Murano.

When I Grow Up

On a day like today, when the weather is muggy (when it isn't raining) and the temperature is so high it ought to be illegal, I often sit at my desk and ponder the meaning of life.

Just kidding, I don't really ponder the meaning of life. I ain't deep like that. Or at least not at the ripe, young age of twenty-seven! I may know many things (like the only President to ever get stuck in the White House bathtub was William H. Taft or that a sea turtle will always return to the same beach of its birth to lay its eggs) but the meaning of life is certainly not one of them. Although I do have some pretty good ideas....wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

I do, however, ponder many other things. The main one being "What do I want to be when I grow up?"

WARNING--this is a loaded question. As a true Gemini, I am the type of person that has many different sides.

My ultimate, ultimate dream job would be a writer. I have always wanted to write for Southern Living or Coastal Living. How awesome would it be to travel to all of these fantastic, charming Southern cities and experience the best restaurants, hotels, events, people, architecture, etc? I can just picture myself meandering down a tree-lined street in Savannah (because you can't just walk in Savannah, you have to meander) or snacking on the best shrimp po-boy New Orleans has to offer. Then I would paint a beautiful picture with words so everyone else could know the unique gems of their next destination. Ahhh...perfection!

If Southern Living doesn't want a somewhat sarcastic, opinionated Southern Belle on staff, then I'm sure 30 Rockefeller Plaza would take me! I have always been a big fan of Saturday Night Live and its cast of characters. I can still quote some "Deep Thoughts" from Jack Handy himself, and I may or may not have reinacted the Blue Oyster Cult skit (I need more cowbell!) with Will Ferrell and Christopher Walken a few thousand times. I also have a slight girl-crush on Tina Fey, but due to current HR regulations, that little tidbit is a moot point.

Now, onto the realm of things that might actually happen....I want to be a lawyer. To be exact, I want to go to law school at Tulane and become an environmental lawyer. I want to fight for the rights of the beauty and majesty that God has blessed us with. The oil spill only makes it even more real to me. All I want to do is stand up and fight for the sea turtles, blue herons, pelicans, dolphins and landscapes of the coast that I love so dearly.

But for today, I'm just gonna sit here and dream. Oh yeah, and answer that dang phone that keeps ringing! What do these people think we're running here--a business or something?!?!?