The DVR as a Metaphor

A few nights ago, as H and I settled in to watch a few of our favorite television shows, we both realized something that was pretty profound:

Our DVR is a good metaphor for our marriage.

I know that sounds completely silly, but hear me out before you judge! We both love the DVR. As two members of the "working class" neither of us have that much time to dedicate to our must-see TV. Or at least not when it is regularly scheduled! So, like millions of other people across the world, we rely on the DVR to make sure we don't miss out on the greats like "Gone With the Wind".

Or "Real Housewives of Orange County".

When it comes to my section of the DVR, you will find a plethora of different shows and movies. I might record "Teen Moms" on MTV, the critically acclaimed "Downton Abbey" on PBS, and a documentary about child soldiers in Botswana all in the same day. I am a Gemini-which is the sign of the twins, or multiple personalities. I like a mixture of so many different things at any given time it almost seems like there is a pageant-obsessed, 14 year-old girl working on a book report operating my remote.

H on the other hand, is different. His viewing habits are much easier to monitor and follow. He enjoys major sporting events, sports talk shows, documentaries about sports icons or historical sporting events, sports news....notice a trend here? These recording traits match up perfectly with the real-life H--a sports enthusiast who is stable, predictable, and completely uninterested in the drama.

As we began to watch our shows that night, I mentioned to him that I had deleted quite a few of his old recordings. There was no need to save the National Championship Game so he could watch it for the fifteenth time.

After I'm done watching a recorded show, I immediately delete it. I'm embarrassed enough to admit I watch "Dance Moms" in the first place, much less to add that I sit through marathons on a Saturday night once everyone is asleep. We need to free up space for future recordings!!!! Likewise, I also discard of things pretty haphazardly in real life. I'm not a sentimental person AT. ALL. Objects and things don't have much meaning for me, so I don't have much trouble tossing things after I'm done with them.

H, however, is the total opposite. For instance, he refuses to let me throw out a hockey puck from his elementary school days back when Mobile was the home of the Mystics. True story. Not sure why he needs that puck or why he wants to relive the glory days of Bama's win over ------- (because I can't even remember or care less), but both live on in our home. One just lives in the drawer next to the fridge and the other takes up valuable space that I will need for "Texas Women".

He tells me there is no need to delete shows to make room for future recordings because the DVR will just delete the oldest stuff to make sure the new stuff gets recorded. He flies by the seat of his pants, not worrying about the little things in life. I fret and worry that an episode of "Beverly Hills 90210" from 1992 will get deleted to record one of Arnold Palmer's classic golf rounds. I like to plan and know that what I want will be there when I want it. But in the end, is it really that important if something doesn't go exactly the way I planned?

Just as we do in real life, our DVR will meet in the middle on a select few shows that we not only enjoy, but bond over. "Mad Men" gets us talking about the generations before us. "Modern Family" will have us laughing over the mundane household issues that can sometimes drag us down. "Doomsday Preppers" leads us to those "what if...?" discussions about government, foreign threats, and mental illness.

And if we're really lucky, we'll stumble across a recording of "Super Troopers" to remind us why fell in love to begin with.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

I never got a chance to post my Christmas decor during Kelly's Korner Show Us Your Life: Christmas Decorations, so I thought better late than never! I love decorating for Christmas, it makes the house so festive and cheery. And since we were hosting Christmas this year I figured it needed to be extra special!

Plus my parents did my serious cleaning so it was the perfect opportunity to show all of you our house! Rest assured it well never be this clean again! Ha!

This is the view as if you walked out of the kitchen and were looking into the living/dining room. I'm proud to admit that I don't spend much on my Christmas decor. I'm a BIG fan of stores like T.J Maxx, Marshall's, Old Time Pottery, and even the Dollar General. If you mix and match things it can look really nice without breaking the bank. For instance, I use a red tablecloth for my tree skirt. Easy, pretty and I can use it other times if needed! I also like to buy vases from OTP and pile them full of red ball ornaments from the Dollar General-it looks festive and is very inexpensive! I made my dining room centerpiece with vases (from OTP), green and red peppermints (Dollar General) and thick red candles from the Dollar Tree (everything's a $1-what, what!)

This is the view when you walk through the front door. Santa had already been by our house that morning, so it's a little bear under the tree at this point!

One of the designers on HGTV once said that if you use the same design elements in repetition, it can look very high-end and expensive. I try to do that as much as possible when it comes to my Christmas decorations. I stick with traditional colors-red, green, silver and white. There are a lot of candy cane stripes throughout all the decor. I personally love it and it's even relatively easy to set up and take down. Winning!


And since I didn't get a chance to actually print my Christmas cards, here is a little nugget of adorableness to hold you over 'til next year!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Another Hysterical Halloween

It was another successful Halloween in the Hysterical District! And trust me, things were certainly hysterical!

For the second year, we barricaded the street off to traffic to make sure all of the little ghouls and goblins were as safe as could be. Thankfully this year, yours truly was NOT in charge of paying the security officers or getting the needed permits. Let's just say last year's debacle was not something I want to relive--even for one paragraph on my blog!

The evening started off with a little pre-party for residents. Now is the time to add that it is AWESOME when the manager of the local Baumhower's Wings and the owner of Mellow Mushroom are my neighbors. Need I explain why?

The local news channel was also there to cover our Halloween happenings so it was nice for our favorite midtown street to get a little love from the press. Helps with resale, let me assure you. If you happened to see a few hip mom and one incredibly adorable Mark Ingram (the Saints version, I must add!), that was in our 'hood!

We were totall prepped and ready for the festivities!

Growing up in the country, I never really experienced the trick-or-treating aspect of Halloween much. (More on this later, I promise) But in our neighborhood...IT. IS. INSANE.

And that is putting it midly.

We spent about $50 on candy and starting passing it out right after 5 pm. My 7 pm, we were completely out. I kid you not there were probably at least 500 people on our street at some points during the evening. I gave most kids one piece each (except for my favorite neighborhood hoodlums) and even gave a few kids some old fortune cookies, but we were still wiped clean by 7 pm. Thankfully, I still had plenty of Pinot Grigio for the occasion. We might run out of Halloween candy, paper towels, and even toilet paper from time to time...but never the necessities for cocktail hour.

Priorities folks, priorities.

As usual, the trick-or-treaters were mostly adorable--some scary, some disturbing, and some incredibly rude and in desperate need of a good slap. Yeah, I said it. But what other form of punishment would be fitting for a 15-year-old kid with no costume that's begging for candy? Seriously, dude?! You could have at least gone through the effort to put on a sheet and called yourself a ghost, then you might have gotten more than an old fortune cookie and a dirty look.

I don't really have a problem with older kids going trick-or-treating on Halloween. But only if they also go through the hassle and embarrassment of the costume. That's the least someone can do when they expect me to spend my hard-earned dough on candy just to give away-at least give me some pleasure of making fun of you in a dorky costume!

The absolute best costumes of the night were not even kids at all. My neighbor knows where I live and would inflict bodily harm if I posted the pics, but let's just say some characters from The Real Housewives of New Jersey made a drunken appearance. And it was awesome.

But let me tell you what WASN'T dorky at all....

This Little Lamb and her Daddy

She wasn't thrilled with the attitudes either!

Stay tuned for my next post...another installment of my "Memoirs" portion, the Childhood Halloween Chronicles of a Country Girl. I had to get permission from my mom to tell the story, and trust me-it's hilarious!

Just Little Ole Me!

It's "Show Us Your Life" Friday over at Kelly's Korner and today's topic is Moms of Only Children. As of right now, I am the mom of an only child, but that isn't really what I wanted to talk about.


But catch me later and we can talk about Sweet Charlotte any other time you want!

You see...yours truly is an only child. That means I have some wonderful insight into the positives and negatives of being the sole heir to a dynasty. And I use the term dynasty VERY loosely here, folks. When my parents got hitched my mom was only 22 or 23 and my dad was 32 or 33. He was obviously much older, but my mom was awfully good looking, and he just couldn't resist her charms! Fast forward two years later and they welcomed a sweet little bundle of joy named Tiffany...and life (nor their bank account) would ever be the same!

Mom and I

My mom had two older sisters and one older brother, so I assumed she probably always intended on having a bigger family or at least one other child. It's funny how life just gets in the way of your good intentions. She probably would have gotten pregnant again when I was 3 or 4, but she wanted to make something more of herself and went back to school to get her degree in Early Childhood Education. She graduated, got a great job doing what she loved, I got older....and time just kind of slipped away from her. Damn that time--it has a tendency to do that.

Daddy and I

This is my Daddy. He is sweet, funny, and all of the best things a daddy should be. He originally thought he was too old to have kids when they got married, but once again he fell subject to my mom's charms. (He tends to do that a lot, in case you haven't noticed) He saw a blue-eyed little girl with curly blonde hair at the Seafood Festival right after they got married and said "If we have kids...I want one just like that!"

Good call, Daddio! I'm glad she changed his mind because although he is good at everything he has ever tried to do (except for maybe his handwriting), his true calling in life was to be a daddy. Cause he's awesome at it.

I have never had a sibling so I don't have a clue what that's like, but I can confirm for all you parents out there on the fence about whether or not to add to your family of 3....being an only child kind of rocked. Here is my list of reasons why:

1.)I believe that with good parents, an only child can thrive academically. My mom jokes that I never really had a first word, I just had many words. From the beginning...and they never stopped once they started. They always talked to me like an adult and they encouraged me to communicate with them like an adult. They had ample time to spend reading to me and cultivating my mind because they weren't distracted and pulled in ten thousand different directions.

2.) Financially speaking, one child is significantly less expensive than even having two kids. My parents were able to give me so many wonderful things throughout my childhood and young adult years. Granted, I know material things aren't the most important things in the world, but my parents used some of those things (horses, cars, etc) as bonding tools and lessons in responsibility. I always knew that these things were blessings and I was a lucky gal to be so fortunate....but they could be taken away as quickly as they were given.

3.) Some of my best memories during childhood were family vacations. Even today we will talk bout how my slow-as-molasses-in-December PawPaw ran from a bear and beat everyone to the car that time we went to Gatlinburg. Though we weren't rich by any means, I have gotten to see parts of the country and world I probably wouldn't have been to see if our family was much bigger.

4.) Being an only child can also be good for your self-esteem. I never had a brother or sister to compare myself to. I've always thought it would have been just horrendous to be "the ugly one" or "the short one" or God forbid, "the fat one". Shudder. My parents thought I hung the moon, and they frequently told me how proud they were of my accomplishments. Likewise, I took that pride very seriously and even today I try my best to never disappoint them or make them embarrassed to be my parents.

Mom and Dad....cute, huh?

Yeah, there were some drawbacks to being an only child. It was lonely at times, but that in turn helped me develop a great imagination and a love for reading and writing. And I will admit that sometimes all of that attention and pressure to be the perfect child got to me. My mom was especially strict and worried way too much about me-probably because I was her one and only. (I've heard moms are always less strict on the second, third, etc kids in line) Eventually I know there will come a time when my parents won't be here and I'll be left as the sole person to handle all of their affairs. I can only imagine how hard that is to go through even with siblings to lean on, much less alone.

But in the end, I'm glad I was an only child. I'm independent, outgoing, creative, imaginative, and driven which no doubt came from my experiences growing up with no siblings.

H and I haven't really decided if we want more children or not. Since we don't need more field hands and none of our offspring would be tall enough to form some sort of family basketball team league, we are still on the fence about reproducing again. The experience of this first one (from pregnancy to childbirth to now) has been so easy, I'm afraid I would have some sort of Rosemary's Baby situation next go round!

And I mean honestly...when you get it perfect the first time there is really no need to try again, right? :)

Disclaimer: However, if anyone at TLC is reading this blog post right now: My uterus can be seduced with promises of any sort of reality show involving us, our dogs, and a shit-ton of kids. Although we may not make the best produce pickers or basketball stars, we are incredibly entertaining!

Random Wednesday Thoughts

Do you ever wonder why we as women compare ourselves to other women so much? Men never seem to do that. Or if they do question their insecurities and compare themselves to other men, they never seem to voice those concerns or even dwell on the outcome of that comparison.

I've never heard a man ask if that other guy's jeans look better than his. And I've certainly never heard a man ask if he was a better father than his neighbor. Or friend. Or even a random dude at the grocery store.

Before I actually was a mom, it was so easy for me to judge other moms out there. I would venture to say I'm probably not the only one who has watched another mom's disciplinary tactics or listened to them voice their struggles and though to myself, "Ha! I will NEVER have that problem because my ways are so much better!" All I know is that I want to make the absolute best decisions for Charlotte, and I want to be the absolute best mom I can possibly be. I'm sure I will make mistakes because mistakes are inevitable in life. Thank the good Lord, we all make them.

I'm trying very hard not to compare myself to other moms these days. In the beginning, it really broke my heart that I wasn't able to breastfeed. If other moms were able to do it, I should have been able to as well. I was literally pissed off that for some reason so many other women had managed to conquer this feat, some even quite successfully. While my baby was just starving to death, there were other moms who bore their leaky boob pads proudly. It killed me! And I saw the look of disdain in some eyes when I shamefully admitted I was using formula to nourish my child. It was hard to overcome that feeling of inadequacy, especially in the beginning when I felt inadequate at everything!

As I strolled my Target onesie-clad baby and adorable little neighborhood girls wearing their adorable smocked bishop dresses just to play in the yard...I must admit I was originally more than a little intimidated. I would compare sweet Charlotte to their children and myself to the moms....and just feel like I fell totally short of the mom I expected myself to be. I threw my own little pity party on more than one occasion.

Facebook and blogs can also be a warzone for women, even if it is unintended sometimes. Some of the responses or comments I read are just so hateful and harsh it blows my mind! It almost makes you afraid to be honest about the things you want to discuss. It's rough looking at other peoples' photos and seeing extravagant birthday parties or crafty home decor. Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge those people at all. I'm happy that they can manage to do all of those things, but there is some jealousy there, too, if I'm being totally honest. It's hard not to fall short every once in a while when you are trying to keep up with the Joneses.

Sometimes I find myself on the good side of my comparisons. I would think to myself "I'm never going to pawn my kid off on a babysitter every single weekend like so-and-so" or "I will spend much more time reading to my child rather than plopping them in front of the TV every evening." No, I'm not proud of it. Pride and insecurity are scary things to face, especially in the midst of the biggest unknown (new parenthood, duh) of my life thus far.

I've compared mine and H's relationship to other marriages. And let me tell you-that is pretty much always a recipe for disaster. There is always going to be someone else's situation that looks better from the outside looking in. It might look easier or more effortless, more loving or more romantic. But then again, you never get to see the stains on the carpet when you're on the outside looking in.

I really feel like this is a terrible habit of the female gender. I hate that so many of us feel like we have to tear other women down to build ourselves up. And I hate that we compare ourselves and our lifestyles to each other on so many different occasions when the simple truth is this: We are all different. Gloriously different. We have different kids, different parenting styles, different marriage relationships, different friendships. We like different foods and kinds of underwear; we even watch different televisions shows and like different kinds of music. It doesn't make me wrong and you right, it just makes us interesting and unique.

Now that I am in charge of the growth, develop, and general outcome of another human being, I'm trying really hard not to judge others so harshly. I've learned that maybe a more laid-back, less judgemental mom is the best kind of mom to be. And I've learned that sometimes the best intentions don't work out the way we planned or expected, and I would hate to know that someone is basing their opinion of me as a mother (or woman) on one simple mistake or bad decision. In the end, it doesn't really matter if Charlotte is wearing a smocked dress on a random Tuesday (although she did yesterday, yay for me!) or even if she doesn't have socks on when the baby next door is dressed like an eskimo when it's still 80 degrees outside. My baby might be smarter than yours, or she might not be potty trained before yours. But I'm going to try my best to reserve judgement and remember that all kids will reach their own milestones in their own time. To quote "Jersey Shore"... "I'm gonna do me. You do you"

I'm fairly certain it will make for a better life in the end.

However, let me worn you in advance....if you have stuffed animals in the back windshield of your car---then yes, I will probably still judge you.

But just a little.

Typical Monday

Disclaimer: You know it's going to be a doozy when the disclaimer comes at the beginning of a story! But I want to warn you, this post is pretty gross so please go back to Facebook now if you have a weak stomach.


That night was rough. And oddly enough, it had nothing to do with having a new baby at home. She was completely innocent and blessedly immune to the trials and tribulations at our house on Monday, September 19th, 2011. The day that will live in infamy.

It all started when I walked in the door after a long day at work...

As I walked in the door, H said "Don't freak out! I know he smells like shit and I'm about to bathe him right now. He rolled in doodoo on his roam and now he smells terrible!"

The "he" H was referring to was our Chocolate Lab, Charlie. Aka Chuck. He likes to go for an afternoon roam around our neighborhood, but he usually comes back unscathed. And he had indeed rolled in some serious doodoo pile somewhere along our street. The whole house smelled like a bucket of crap. It smelled SO terrible it made my eyes water. And I'm used to smelling some pretty stinky stuff!

So H grabbed Chuck's leash and some shampoo and hauled his dirty butt outside for a bath. The poor dog was COVERED in dried, caked-on doodoo. It was all over him, including his previously red collar. Charlotte, Lois (the little dog) and I walked outside with them to watch the rather amusing spectacle. Then we took a nice leisurely stroll around the 'hood so Chuck would dry off somewhat. Ahhh...peace and sanity still ruled at this point in the evening.

When we walked back inside after our walk, the ENTIRE house smelled like poo. I thought "What is the deal?!?! He just had a bath, he doesn't stink now, why does the house smell like the toilet at a fraternity house!?!?!?" We searched and searched and eventually found the culprit.

It was underneath the bed.

Apparently not only had he rolled in some other dog's "surprise", he'd also eaten it. Yep. I said eaten it. And then he threw it up in a nice, neat little pile underneath our bed. And it smelled about the way you would expect it to smell.

Now is the time to mention H has a very weak stomach. That means Super Mom here was left to clean up that pile of disgustingness. He lifted the bed while I cleaned.

And all was right with the world again.

Until Chuck got on the couch and puked up the rest of his afternoon snack. At this point, I'm wondering exactly what kind of boots I want to make with dog hide, but I grab some paper towels and start cleaning. H grabs a garbage bag and attempts to help me dispose of the mess.

And then H vomits on the floor, too!

Heaven help me! I'm about to have a purse to go with those boots now!

So I cleaned up THREE piles of vomit last night. Count 'em: THREE! Like I said, it was a rough night in the Hysterical District. Thankfully sweet little innocent Charlotte slept right on through this debacle or I would have had to have been committed. But it's nothing a BIG glass of wine on my doodoo-free porch couldn't wash away!

Thank you Lord for dogs and husbands. My life would be awfully boring without them! But I'm warning you, think long and hard before you complain about another shitty Monday. It could always be worse!

What We've Been Up To...

First things first...SWEET BABY CHARLOTTE IS HERE! She joined the party June 27th at 3:41 pm weighing in at 7 lbs 6 oz and 20" long.

She's been here for a little over a month, which will probably explain the lapse in time since I last wrote a blog post. I've been on maternity leave (thank the good Lord) for six weeks and since I do most of my writing while I'm "working" (aka trying to look busy at my desk) I just figured my adoring fans could wait. I kid, I kid.

Things are blissfully wonderful on the home front. Charlotte sleeps about 10 hours a night, never cries, and her poop smells like sunshine and unicorns.

Again... I kid, I kid.

BUT things are pretty darn wonderful. Don't get me wrong, we have some good days and some bad days, but overall things are better than I could have ever imagined. First of all Charlotte is healthy and that was of course the biggest blessing of all. I made it through labor and delivery pretty much in one piece and without too much trauma (although I might not be able to say the same for H). And despite my two uterus (uteri?) and the fact that Charlotte was coming out malpresented (sunny-side up, only happens 5% of the time or something crazy) I managed to squeeze her out the old-fashioned way without a C-section. And plenty of drugs, like God intended.

People warned me I would never sleep again, but even sleep has been more frequent than I anticipated. I averaged a couple of naps a day because I am a firm believer in sleeping when the baby sleeps. Dishes, laundry, and sweeping be damned! She gets a bath at 9, then a bottle, then it's off to sleep until 2 or 2:30. She wakes up, takes another bottle and goes back to sleep until about 5:30. Overall, it's a pretty good schedule for a newborn and we are SO thrilled. My biggest disappointment is that I couldn't breastfeed her. I'm convinced that I did something wrong and I still feel guilty about it, but I figured even the lowly formula was better than letting the kid starve to death.

My 6 weeks of maternity leave flew by and as much as I loved getting to bond with her--I'm incredibly happy to be back at work. First of all, I'm thankful to have a job in this miserable economy, and I missed my coworkers (who are a pretty funny bunch). I also missed getting to leave the house and converse with adults about intelligent things like the upcoming football season, reality television, and stupid email forwards. I guess it makes me a bad mother, but I need the break that work provides. I need stimulation outside of poopy diapers-even if they do smell like unicorns and sunshine. It makes me a better, more patient wife and mother when I return at the end of the work day. And since people and dogs around my house like to eat and enjoy things like air conditioning and cable it is something I can justify. Don't get me wrong-I have the utmost respect for stay-at-home moms because it is seriously hard work. It's just not my cup of tea.

Overall, we are completely smitten with the new addition. She is lovely and perfect and sweet and cute and looks absolutely NOTHING like me! She does have my lips and one dipple like me, but that is the only mark I left on the child after almost 10 months in my belly. Sad, but true. Thankfully H ended up making an adorable little girl!

So...it's back to the grind as we learn to adjust to real life with a baby. So far the transition has been relatively smooth, but my head isn't that far in the sand to know that there will inevitably be rough times ahead. I'm just so happy to have H, Charlotte, Chuck and Lois along for the ride! Now that I'm back at work I will be posting more frequently with insight into our new way of life in the Hysterical District.

TDC

PS-Even with an epidural, the stork concept is WAY better than the actual thing!

Another Pregnancy Post

I thought I would write/type a few things down about this pregnancy so one day when I look back I can remember what it was REALLY like. If Charlotte is anything like me, she will love hearing stories about herself-even when she was in the womb.

I have always been afraid of pregnancy, but it really has been a breeze for the most part. I know I am incredibly lucky because I never really even had any morning sickness. The only time I remember getting sick was when one of my coworkers ate a shrimp fettucine Lean Cuisine one day for lunch, and the smell made me nauseous. Which in turn prompted me to take a pregnancy test...and you all know how that ended up! This was three days after Halloween weekend and a Widespread Panic concert in New Orleans, so I thought it could have been the remnants of the New Orleans funk but instead we were pleased to discover it was a little bambino instead!

The first trimester was great. I only gained a couple of pounds, no sickness, and only a mild tiredness. I didn't even feel pregnant, which can be good or bad. I must admit I felt a little left out as my friends drank and partied during football games, but I knew the sacrifice would be well worth it. As the baby started moving and growing, and I started to actually feel pregnant, the constant reminder of impending parenthood made missing out on things much easier!

We weren't going to find out the sex of the baby, and part of me still wishes we hadn't. We told the ultrasound tech not to tell us, so she wrote it on the pics, put it in an envelope, and sent it home with us. Of course after about two days we just couldn't stand it any longer! And then we found out we were going to be broke forever as parents of a little girl. :)

People always ask what cravings I've had. The only thing I can think of is ice cream and fruit (especially citrus fruits). And even then I wouldn't exactly call it a craving. The only real way to explain it is that foods just taste better--better than they have EVER tasted before! It's like my taste buds are on steroids and it makes everything more delicious.

Picking a name was SO hard! Once we finally realized that you can't please everybody all of the time, we settled on a beautiful family name that we love-Charlotte Day Carrigan. Or at least I love it, and isn't that really all that matters? :)

The nursery has been done for about a month, and sometimes I just go sit in there and imagine what it will be like when Charlotte is here. H does it, too. I've had four baby showers (Dauphin Island, Kinston, Orange Beach, and work) and we have been so blessed to receive the wonderful gifts our friends and family have bestowed upon us. I'm not sure we deserve it all, but we certainly appreciate it. I wish every pregnant woman could have this because it has definitely taken a lot of stress off of us! My bags are packed for the hospital, our co-pay is paid, we took the birthing class, and we are as ready as we are gonna get. I think.

At 37 1/2 weeks pregnant, my feelings are mixed. I am excited, scared, nervous, ready, anxious, amazed, hot, uncomfortable....the list goes on. I am nervous because a)she has to get OUT somehow b) what are we supposed to do when she gets here? c) what if my "instincts" that people keep referring to don't kick in? d) what if she's allergic to the dogs? e) what if my water breaks in public? f.) how do I know if she's too hot or too cold? It's 100 degrees outside so I'm always hot, but what about a baby? g) how will our family dynamics change? Seriously I could list about a million thoughts/worries that run through my head a million times a day-but I won't bore you with those.

All I know is that our lives are about to change dramatically in a matter of days. My brain can't even fathom the thought of how much is about to change. With no brothers or sisters, I have nothing whatsoever to compare this to other than my dogs. People laugh when I say that, but I love my dogs more than the average person so that is the only point of reference I have. All I know is that H and I are beyond excited to meet Miss Charlotte. That's all we can talk about. H says she's going to be the best female golfer ever, and he can't wait until she's big enough to fish in the Little Anglers Fishing Rodeo with him. Hearing the man I love talk about what he wants to do with our daughter makes me turn to a puddle of mush, I must admit. I just want her to be smart and independent and full of life. And happy-God I hope she is happy with the life we give her.

37.5 weeks pregnant and wishing the whole stork story was really how babies got here,
TDCy

The No-No List

For the duration of this pregnancy I have been planning, anticipating, thinking, scheduling, and contemplating parenthood. I have already decided that my child will not only be absolutely adorable, she will no doubt also be the smartest, funniest, wittiest, coolest, etc child that ever graced the planet.

Well...duh! If you are a parent or about to be a parent in less than 4 weeks and you DON'T think those things, I would be worried.

And of course, it must be said that the main reason why Sweet Charlotte will be so smart, funny, witty, adorable, and cool is because she will have the most intelligent, well-read, well-intentioned, and maternally blessed mom in the world. Oh yeah and dad, too, but this is my blog not his so let's focus on what's really important here.

Well...duh, again! If I didn't think I was going to be a fantabulous mom I wouldn't have been actively doing the deed that causes such things.

So in all my wisdom I have compiled a list of things that I/we will NOT be doing once Charlotte arrives. Now, if you find yourself somehow on the following list--please do not be offended. I fully realize that all children are different and all parents have different parenting styles. And I also realize that I am writing this pre-baby, before I've had to deal with the not-so-glamorous side of mommyhood. So take it all with a hefty portion of of salt.

Pregnancy Photos
I am talking about belly-baring photos here folks. I wasn't exactly thrilled with the "before" belly shots so I can be damn certain there will be NO photos of my belly while I am with child.

Delivery Room Photos
Call me vain, I don't care. But there will also be NO photos of any kind in the delivery room. Write it down because this might as well be written on the 10 Commandments that Moses brought down from the Mount. "Thou shalt not have pictures of your vagina on record-no matter the circumstances". I am more than happy to pose for pictures with my beautiful baby AFTER we are appropriately groomed and ready to make our debut, thankyouverymuch.

Co-Sleeping
H and I have a queen-sized bed that we already share with our 13 lb furbaby, Lois. And occasionally a 70 lb lab that likes to sneak in while I'm sleeping alone. Besides the fact that there is just literally no room at the inn, I'm a firm believer in the fact that babies and children need their own space just like adults do. Beds are for naughty, adult things like eating ice cream and watching reality television, NOT for "family togetherness" and such. Now I realize that if my child is scared or sick, this rule is bendable. But the exceptions will be few and far between, trust me.

Bedtime
Charlotte will have a bedtime until she is no longer living under our roof. We will not be those parents who let our child stay up until all hours of the night. Children and babies need structure and schedules. It helps them learn and pay attention, aids in digestion, makes them happier and more emotionally well-balanced....the list goes on. I had a bedtime until I left for college and look how great I turned out! Once she enters the real world and has a job, she will realize that even adults do better with a bedtime and schedule.

Homeschool
I think parents who homeschool their kids are weird. I also think most kids who are homeschooled are weird. Sorry! But seriously...kids learn more from school than just what they get from books. It's all about the experience as a whole-just like college. And as much as we might want to shield are children from the weirdos and freaks of the world, I don't know of any adults who have figured out how to hide from the weirdos and freaks once it comes time to do adult things like pay a mortgage. Embrace the freaks at an early age, that's my philosophy. If you can successfully dodge them on the playground, the office water cooler will be a breeze in 20 years.

Breastfeed
Yes, I am going to breastfeed. And I will do so successfully because I refuse to accept the alternate option of failing. I'm a winner and I will win at breastfeeding! (I repeat this quite often so don't laugh at me!) But, with that being said, I will not be one of those moms who is breastfeeding in public. Eewww. I know, I know...it's natural and blah, blah, blah. That's why they made bathrooms. And dressing rooms. And cars. There is no need to whip these things out in public and make other people watch my child at the trough. I don't want to watch YOU do it, so you know--the golden rule and all that stuff.

Also under this heading, but Point B: I will not be breastfeeding my toddler. Once the kid is old enough to say "Yo mom, whip that boob out! What's a kid gotta do to get some lunch around here!?!" I think it's time to move on to other options.

Again, feel free to laugh at my haughty list of things I think I won't be doing as a parent. In five years, if I'm still writing and imparting wisdom to the masses, feel free to laugh at me if you catch me breastfeeding my baby from the shopping cart while I peruse the isles at my local Winn Dixie. I promise I won't blame you one bit.

36 weeks and counting,
TDC

Name That Baby

Sound the trumpets! Alert the media! The baby has a name! After 31 weeks of incubating, we have finally reached a decision on what our little bundle of joy will be called. And it is....

Charlotte Day Carrigan

We hope you all like it! If you don't...PLEASE don't tell me because I've tried so hard to please so many different people and my emotions simply can't take another wishy-washy game of Name That Baby. (Mom, if you need to, re-read that sentence before you call me and tell me you don't like this name.)

Here are some of the reasons why we chose Charlotte:

1.) It is my grandmother's name and H's aunt's name so it has family meaning on both sides.

2.) There are no odd associations that either of us can think of when we think "Charlotte." For instance, H didn't know someone ugly in elementary school with the same name. And I don't have an archenemy named Charlotte. Most importantly, Charlotte is a name and not a word that means something else, which was H's argument against Dayleigh.

3.) It is easy to spell AND pronounce. Winning!

4.) It is a good, traditional Southern name. And you can pronounce it "Cha-a-lotte" when you wanna REALLY poor on that twang. And of course, I do like to do that when I reenact scenes from Gone With the Wind so I figured it would work for all situations.

5.) She will not have 6 other little girls in her class with the same name. I knew about 10 Tiffanys at Kinston, I had approximately 6 close friends named Nicole, and I've lost count of the Brittanys, Ashleys, and Amandas I know.

6.) Although it's not too common, she will still (hopefully) be able to find monogrammed cups, keychains, and other knick-knacks with her name on it when she goes to the beach for Spring Break.

7.) It sounds good with our last name because unless Prince William manages to get a divorce and find me in the Deep South, I'm sure she will have that name for a while. (Just kidding--kinda)

8.) I know a lot of great Charlottes--my Me-Maw Charlotte, Princess Charlotte of Monaco (Grace Kelly's granddaughter), the good-girl Charlotte from Sex in the City, the plucky spider from my favorite children's book....the list goes on.

9.) I can just imagine that she will look like a Charlotte. And that makes me happy.

10.) I'm all out of legitimate reasons, but I feel weird ending on "9" so....last but not least...because I like it!

Another Random Thursday

I got a request from a fan of my blog (and don't worry, I don't really think my friends are "fans" I just like saying that cause it makes me feel good) to hurry up and write a new post! I was thrilled that someone actually cares about anything I have to say, although I've always thought my own opinion was pretty darn valuable! Unfortunately, I don't have much to say these days. Things are be-bopping along quite nicely with the pregnancy as I triumphantly enter my third and final trimester. 12 weeks or less until this sweet lil gal makes her appearance! We're pumped, excited, scared, worried, busy, broke, curious, petrified.....the list goes on but I'll just stop there. You get the picture I'm sure. With my mind completely absorbed by all things baby, I guess this might be one of those random posts about not much of anything important. Here goes! 1.) I need a tan. I was pasty before, which is the norm for me during the winter months. I don't really believe in tanning beds anyway, and of course I can't get in one now anyway. I like to worship the sun safely--with SPF 30 slathered on all exposed areas. Big looks better brown, didn't you know? I bought a baby pool for the backyard so I could tan in private. And then the temp dropped and my lab has gotten more use out of it than me. 2.) The upstairs "Guest Suite" that I chronicled earlier on my blog is now complete (minus the furniture). But I'm too lazy to upload the photos and share it with you. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna post them at some point in the next few days, but until then you will have to be content in knowing that I laid in the floor of my house for the first time in almost 4 years. And it was wonderful! 3.) The nursery is almost done! We are just waiting on the dresser to finally get here because apparently it has been held up somewhere between Mobile and the facility in Mississippi. It is only a 4-hour drive and I'm sure there are multiple delivery trucks going back and forth throughout the course of the day....but for some reason the dresser is delayed "In Transit." I guess that means someone in Mississippi is using it to store their moonshine or fighting roosters in it for the weekend's festivities. 4.) Facebook. Ahhh, Facebook. Why do people insist on putting such personal information on Facebook? I'm constantly amazed at the crap some folks will post. First of all, let me say that you are NOT going to win that boyfriend back by A) announcing via status update how much he's lost B) Telling him how pathetic he is for dumping your crazy tail and/or C) trying to guilt him into taking you back with sad posts about your lonely future. Whatever happened to "don't let 'em see ya sweat?" That was always my motto. Well, that and "If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with!" 5.) I bought a Nook, which is an eReader similar to a Kindle. So far I love it, but I'm a weirdo that likes to read. That's about all I got today. This weekend is going to be full of golf and baby pool fun (if the weather warms up). The Masters is this weekend so I'm sure I will have to watch H's golf swing about a million times, plus hear him go on and on about the azaleas, Phil, Tiger, how cool it would be to play that course, how much he wants to go to Augusta, how he needs to quit his job and dedicate his life to golf so he can make the tour.... Although I wouldn't mind being drug along behind him to fancy private clubhouses across the country for cocktails, press parties, spa days, etc! Mom, I will even let you come along and be our nanny while we travel the circuit! What can I say, I'm nothing if not generous!

LONG Weekend

Whew. I'm pooped! It's bad when you need to come back to work just to recover from the weekend. And that is especially bad if the weekend didn't even involve any alcohol beverages and Waffle House trips at 2 am!

My parents came down for the weekend and we set out to conquer quite a list of chores. H was working, so he foolishly thought he would be let off the hook. Little did he know....our kitchen sink and my dad had other plans.

Friday night we rode down to The Wharf in Orange Beach for the Zac Brown Band concert. I only go to few concerts every year, and most of them are Widespread Panic shows so this was a treat for me. Plus it's really nice to do something fun with the parentals every now and then. I realized my mom obviously hasn't been to a concert or sporting event in about 15 years because she was shocked and appalled by the $6 beers. Note to mom: Don't ever go to the Super Dome where Bloody Mary's are $12 and domestics are $8! The bleachers are much more uncomfortable when you are 6 1/2 months pregnant, but other than that it was a blast. And it was cute to see mom and dad snuggling and dancing to the slow jams.

Saturday morning, my parents where up with the chickens AS USUAL. Apparently no one ever told them that weekends are for sleeping in because they were up at the crack of dawn. Seriously--we had walked the dogs, gone out for breakfast, and taken showers before 8. Sigh. Unfortunately I will never break them of this habit. Trust me--I've tried.

Mom and I set out to register for baby items. It is just as much fun as it sounds! I'm not really much of shopper, it's just never been my cup of tea. I'm good for an hour or so and usually one or maybe two stores. But all day trips are just not for me. I think it stems from an incident in my childhood that I refer to as "The Living Room Curtain Debacle of '94". It was a terrible, horrific day of my life that involved my mom dragging me to multiple department stores in and around the Wiregrass area in search of living room curtains. We spent 9 hours looking at-you guessed it-curtains. And we went back to the same stores more than once to "get a second look" at things. I eventually passed out from exhaustion in the floor of Dillards and got a good 2-hour nap.

It took me an hour to pick out my wedding dress, if that tells you how hard that whole experience was for me.

Anyway....back to my point. She really helped me with the registeries because if it would have just been H and I, we would be lost. As a matter of fact, our first trip to Babies R Us should have been filmed we were so clueless! So now we will have a ton of stuff, even if we don't know how to use half of it! Who am I kidding--I don't even know the purpose for half of it! And mom had me registering for everything under the sun. I bet the CEOs of Graco and Walmart are sitting in their plush offices having a good 'ol laugh at the suckers who find it necessary to buy some of this stuff. And then they go out on their yachts and toast to my mom--the lady who thinks it's necessary to buy a mesh sack to wash baby clothes in. Because obviously you can't just put clothes in the washing machine!

Meanwhile back at the ranch...dad was busy fixing a leak in our kitchen sink, which I thought meant replacing the washer in the faucet. I came home to discover my husband and dog under the house and half of the backside of it laying in the yard. Apparently our drain pipe was half rusted through and the contents of our garbage disposal have been piling neating under our house for the past few years. Yum.

After MANY enjoyable hours of my dad (the perfectionist) and his son-in-law (still tired from his night shift the previous night) working on the pipes AND 7 trips to the local hardware store, everything was patched up and ready to go. I bought pizza for my labor crew and they settled in to watch a bootleg copy of True Grit while I hit the hay at the exciting hour of 9 pm.

Woo hoo for Saturday nights!

Good thing I went to bed early because I was up early AGAIN the next morning. But sadly not early enough to catch the sunrise trip to Krispy Kreme donuts that our two houseguests took. So mom and I walked the pooches while daddy did a final inspection on his handywork from the day before.

And lo and behold...the dang pipe was leaking again! Arghhh. It's enough to make a saint cuss--and he did, actually! But after one trip to Lowe's and about 3 more hours worth of work--the pipe was repaired and the giant gaping hole in the back of my house was patched. Patched with plywood, but it was patched nonetheless.

Then mom and dad got the heck out of dodge before he found another task to tackle.

And I promptly took a 2 hour nap to recover from my hard job of supervising the repairs.

Overall, it was really a great weekend. Dayleigh's room is painted, furniture is en route as I type, and the registries are DONE. I kid and joke and give them a hard time, but it's always great when I get to see my parents. I love them dearly and they provide some nice perspective into the Hysterical District. Plus my mom likes to clean, which is an added bonus!

And she can always find some dog hair to sweep up!

Worries

Being a first-time mother-to-be, there are some things that keep me awake at night. Not necessarily the typical thoughts or what-ifs that come along with a child, thoughts like "Will she be healthy?" or "Will she have ten fingers and ten toes?" and "Will she be cute?" Of course I wonder/worry about these types of things as they are inevitable in a pregnant woman's mind. But for today, I am more focused on the lighter side of pregnancy, childbirth, child rearing, and imparting of wisdom that I will face in the next 18 or so years. I don't want to pretend that these are more important than the other more serious concerns like numbers of fingers and toes---but well, the possibilities are just too scary for my mind to comprehend so I prefer to pretend like they simply don't exist.

That's how I've gotten through life thus far, so I will just stick with that method for now.

I am SO lucky to be having this type of pregnancy. After listening to some of my friends talk about their experiences, I half expected to find myself mentally insane, puking my internal organs up from morning to night, or just laying around being fanned by palm fronds while I ate peeled grapes. So far it's been a breeze. As in...I can't even tell I'm pregnant except for the fact that my clothes no longer fit and my boobs are looking fab-u-lous. Well, that and the fact that I could quite possibly blow the doors off a house with the indigestion/burps I have lately. But even in the midst of my pregnancy nirvana, I worry. I worry about things like:

1.) Hemorrhoids--Ummm...no thanks, Baby! I'm good! I have no desire to have these things that I'm not even 100% sure what they are and how they get there, but I know WHERE they are and that is enough for me to know I could do without them.

2.) Poop--I've heard through the grapevine that it is possible for a woman to poop during childbirth. Now H and I have been through a lot together over the past 7-8 years, and we've both seen some things that we wish we could un-see. But pooping on a table is NOT something I want to add to that list. God have mercy on my soul if that happens because I will never live it down. And it might, just might, keep us from having Baby # 2.

3.) Large Baby--I want a healthy baby, don't get me wrong. But is it too much to ask for a child of a normal birth weight? I was a lil thing at only 5 lbs, but H was like Andre the Giant from what I hear. Okay, maybe not Andre the Giant! But to a chick who is only 5'1, an almost 9 lb baby just sounds impossible. And like torture. I am so afraid this baby is going to be a mutant thing with a head like a bowling ball. I'm thinking a cross between that shim wrestler China, me, and H. If that ain't scary, I don't know what is. Seriously...it gives me nightmares.

4.) Breast Feeding--Yep, I'm gonna breast feed. It is by far the healthiest way to nourish a child. It's nature's way after all! And I WILL succeed at this as I'm leaving myself no other option. But I worry so much about it-especially considering I don't know many other moms who did it. Will she like it? Will it hurt? Will it make H feel left out? Most importantly though (and let's be honest) will it make my boobs look crazy afterward? Will one be saluting the heavens and the other be dragging the infield? How do I keep them balanced? Does that pump feel as painful as it looks? Does it come with instructions? Obviously I need to do some reading on this subject before the big day arrives...

5.) Intelligence--We will love Baby C like nothing we've ever loved before, of this I am sure. But what if she's dumb as a box of hammers? I have no patience for stupid. What if she isn't witty and funny? H and I have always said the reason we are together is because we "get" each other. We laugh at the same things, and usually it is something along the smartass lines. (I hate to admit it, but it's true) What if she thinks Larry the Cable Guy is funny and Justin Beiber is the best ever? Yikes. What if we have to go the rest of our lives explaining jokes to her because she just doesn't "get" it?

6.) Details--What about the details? People keep telling me "Don't worry-once she pops out you'll just KNOW! Your motherly instincts will just appear and you'll know!" But what if that doesn't happen? What if God didn't give me a Motherly Gene and instead replaced it with the ability to pinch/pick up things with my toes? I consider myself fairly competent. I'm sure I can figure out how to put on a diaper and such. But how do I learn to trim tiny fingernails? How do I know when she should be eating cereal? What if she doesn't potty train on time? Or at all?

I'm sure it will all come to me/us. Thankfully I have tons of friends who are mommies. And some I even value their opinions! Haha-just kidding! I am prepared for tons of advice, whether I really want it or not. Some we will take and some we will toss--I'm guessing that every new set of parents have to find out what works for them. No two children are the same so there is really no reason to expect two parenting styles to be the same. And I'm hopefully that for the things good 'ol fashioned experience can't remedy (like oddly disproportionate boobies) there is surgery!

Besides, if this baby turns out half as good as our fur children--we should be good!

Christmas Recap

Whew! Christmas is finally OVA, and I must admit...I always hate to see it go. I imagine Christmas is somewhat like post-partem depression. I look forward to it for months and months, the anticipation building with each passing day. Then, C-day arrives and all of that excitement fades away as reality rears its ugly head. People tend to lose that spirit of Christmas way too quickly. Back to work, early morning alarms, no more smells of Christmas trees and cookies baking, no more presents to wrap or open, no more festive parties to attend....sigh.

But this year, the new year holds something pretty darn exciting for us, and the day after Christmas didn't seem quite so hollow. I was almost happy to see the 26th roll around simply because it means we are one day closer to meeting the newest addition to our family of 4 (cause of course I count our first-born fur babies, too!)

But enough sap, let's get down to the good stuff!

We had a super busy Christmas holiday, starting with our Eve of Christmas Eve dinner with H's mom. Since we all get so tired of the typical Christmas menu, she decided to do a potato soup buffett and it was delish! Let me suggest that to anyone who wants to do something a little different next year. She made a big pot of regular potato soup, then placed a plethora of toppings out for us to choose from: bacon, cheese, ham, onions, broccoli, carrots...and biscuits for good measure. She completed the meal with a delicious homemade spiced cider of which legends are made. Seriously...it had orange peels in it and was unbelievable.

Holly, who I have mentioned is a fabulous local artist, bartered her goods for some gifts, and no one was disappointed. I got a lovely Mardi Gras mask that I will certainly put to good use as I "let the good times roll" in a few months. Although I will be VERY pregnant by then, I refuse to let it ruin my revelry. Sorry I can't post pics...I must remain "en costume" or you will know who I am as I toss you beads from my lofty throne!

On Christmas Eve day we headed over to Perdido Beach to my Aunt Lynda & Uncle Ronnie's house. They have five grandkids and another on the way (not counting my bun in the oven), so it is always a lot of fun watching all of the kids tear into their presents. Plus, I love all of my cousins' wives so it's nice to actually have some girls around nowadays. Apparently the boy gene is awfully strong in our family-I'm the only girl of 5 boys on my mom's side, and the only girl on my dad's side, too. There are currently four grandsons (plus one on the way) and one granddaughter on my dad's side. I wonder what ours will be--but I guess we have a long way to go before we find out!

Anywhoo...after a lunch of seafood gumbo, pork tenderloin, and various other tasty treats, we packed up and headed Northeast to good 'ol Kinston.

It struck me on more than one occasion that this would be our last Christmas morning in Kinston, which makes me more than a little nostalgic. Next year I definitely want to have Christmas morning at our house since we will have a 6-month-old by then! (Yikes!) I am adamant about our family traditions starting early, plus I don't want to be lugging toys, clothes, and baby crap all over the Southeast. I'm sure Santa will still be able to find me...I mean, us. :)

Overall, Christmas was wonderful. It's such a magical time of year, and being with those I love the most makes it even better. Each year I am amazed at how awesome my family is (and just ask us, we'll tell ya! Haha!) and I realize how blessed I am to have such a close-knit, loving, and funny group around me.

And now....for a list of the Top 10 Best Foods I ate over the Christmas Holidays:
10.) Potato Soup-it hit the spot and was the perfect "something different" I was looking for
9.) Taco Bell yesterday although it gave me some INTENSE indigestion
8.) Chocolate Covered Ritz with Peanut Butter-'nough said
7.) My mother-in-law's spiced cider
6.) Aunt Lynda's crawfish dip
5.) Butterfinger Cake
4.) Camp Stew the day after Christmas
3.) Steak-we decided against the typical Christmas dinner and had steak instead. Great decision!
2.) Granny's Red Velvet Cake
1.) Granny's Dumplings. God bless you Granny!

Now...after eating all of that in a span of 4 days, WHY IN THE WORLD did I schedule a doctor's appointment today when I knew I would have my first weigh-in of the second trimester?!?!?!

A Tale of Christmas Past

Kelly's Korner Blog is having another "Show Us Your Life" theme and today's theme is holiday decor. Please pardon the photos, they were taken with my crappy camera from last year. I would love to say that our historical home's halls are decked and festive this year, but the baby (which seems to suck the energy out of me faster than a Thanksgiving turkey) has made it a little more difficult this year. So....please enjoy the photos from Christmas 2009, when we were full of holiday cheer and decorating gumption.

Actually, I'm still full of cheer, just not so full of energy. I keep hoping a wonderful elf (or husband, or mother-in-law) would magically appear, but apparently I haven't been good enough this year to warrant that type of goodwill toward men.

And in my defense, we did a TON of holiday entertaining last year that actually warranted some serious holiday decorating. We hosted our second annual Tacky Christmas Sweater Party, the appetizer leg of our street's Progressive Dinner, and the Christmas Bunco/Dirty Santa/Wine-Induced Gymnastics in the Front Yard Extravaganza. Ahhh...good times. Since we (technically I since it's a No Boys Allowed Event) are only hosting the Bunco Christmas Party this year, I figured the girls will just have to understand my situation.

I'm pooped. Every day, all day.

But please....enjoy the ghosts of Christmas Decorating Past!




This is a picture of our kitchen, plus little Lois. When you are the lucky owner of these lovely wreath-green cabinets, it makes it VERY easy to decorate for Christmas! And, just for a funny little side note--the Christmas mat you see at the base of the sink was from The Dollar Tree. You know, the store where everything is $1. And let me tell ya, folks, you get what you pay for. This mat read "Mery Christmas!"

My fabulous, artistically-blessed mother-in-law made the two arrangements for me last year (see above and below). As with all things in my life, we like to ball on a budget-even at Christmas. These are made of Dollar Tree ornaments, random Mardi Gras beads we caught the previous year, and real branches I stole during our afternoon dog walks. (Minus the Lenox candleholders, which were NOT cheap but a lovely wedding present that we use quite often.)

Here is a view of the living room (if you were standing in the dining room). I am a Christmas-tree Natzi. I insist on a real tree, every year...no exceptions...no subsitutions...and I refuse to even hear talk of the fakes. No offense to those who pull theirs down from the attic the weekend after Thanksgiving, but that boat won't float in the Hysterical District. The smell is the best part! It's even better than the fun we have driving to the hood to buy it from the local charitable organization. And it's definitely H's favorite part of Christmas! (If there was such a thing as a sarcastic font, I would have just used it for that last sentence.)

Merry Christmas!

And yes, if anyone wants to take pity on my and come pick out, purchase, drag home, set up (straight), decorate, and eventually take down on or shortly after January 2---by all means c'mon! I'll even make you some shrimp n' grits as a thank-you!

Christmas is Here!

Christmas is right around the corner! Woo hoo!!! Excitement abounds, at least for me. H doesn't get into the spirit of the holidays quite as much as I do, but most men tend to keep their excitement under wraps about things such as this and I've accepted that fact after almost 4 years of marriage.

I love the holiday season and (almost) everything about it. I love the feeling of goodwill that most people seem to have in abundance this time of year. I love holiday parties with friends and family, warm fires, champagne cocktails, carols, and the smell of a Christmas tree. I love family traditions and the excitement of finding the absolute perfect gift for a loved one. Ahhh....there is nothing like this time of year.

I try my best to not forget the real meaning of Christmas, the birth of Jesus Christ. I know this holiday is about Him and the ultimate gift, but sometimes it's easy to get caught up in the wordly aspect and commercialization of Christmas.

Don't get me wrong--I LOVE getting presents. I love the anticipation of waking up Christmas morning and not knowing what's wrapped in the big, beautiful boxes under the tree. And I have been known to get disappointed when I didn't get exactly what I wrote on my wish list (I'm only human). But in the end, I know the real meaning of this joyous holiday. It's about the birth of our Savior, giving unselfishly, and surrounding yourself with family and friends.

I hate to get all sentimental here, but I will blame my emotional post on pregnancy hormones. :) This year is our last Christmas without Baby C--next year at this time we will have a 6 month old! Besides that being absolutely nutso, it makes me more than a little weepy thinking about all of the traditions I hope to pass down to the wee one and all of the memories we will build as a little family. I hope he or she will find this time of year as magical as I do.

I have to thank my parents for making Christmas so amazing. I remember us doing so many wonderful things. They would host Christmas parties for me and my friends, and my mom would spend countless hours shopping and making goodies for us to eat. Hayrides, scavengar hunts, and even a mid-December Polar Bear Swim in our pool. They would always take me (and usually multiple friends) to Christmas City in Ariton. I also remember riding around the nicer neighborhoods in Dothan and Enterprise looking at the beautiful Christmas decorations, going to pick out the perfect live Christmas tree, and wrapping presents and decorating the house with my mom. I was so blessed to never worry about being cold, hungry, or present-less on Christmas day. I have only wonderful Christmas memories--and I hope my child will be able to say that one day, too.

I'm not sure if it was the Glee Christmas episode last night on TV or the pregnancy hormones-but either way I am a happy gal today with St. Nick on the brain. I hope you and yours enjoy this wonderful time of year--don't forget the REAL reason we celebrate, but don't get too serious on me and forget to enjoy some hot cocoa and a nice present either!

Merry Christmas lovelies!
TDC

Busy Week

Whew! It has been a busy week here in The Hysterical District. We had a LOT going on. Let me start waaayyy back in the beginning...

Monday, Nov. 22nd--We heard the heartbeat for the first time! That's right, folks, we are welcoming a child into this scary world. Baby HDC (whether boy or girl) will be here on or around June 30th--and we are pretty darn excited! I will be 10 weeks on Wednesday, so we wanted to wait until we were "in the clear" before making any big announcements. But we heard a nice, steady, fast and healthy heartbeat so the cat's out of the bag! I guess our little New Orleans adventure was the final hoorah for our young, carefree days. But that's okay--I've had a good run.

We are also scared to death. :) For those that don't know me that well, now would be a good time to say that I don't know anything about babies. I've never changed a diaper, bathed or fed a baby. I am an only child with no real interest in other people's children. And H--well he is in the same boat. I picture our adventures in parenthood as National Lampoon meets Vince Vaughn. God bless this child.

Please note: This is not an invitation to change your child's diaper or babysit for you. No offense, but I don't really like other people's kids that much so we will just wait to screw up our own if that's okay. We will love ours unconditionally because it will be beautiful, perfect, adorable, and sleep through the night from birth onward--but yours is your problem. And I mean that in the nicest way possible, bless your sweet heart. :)

Thursday, Nov. 25th--Happy Thanksgiving to all and to all a good night! Oh wait....that's not right...We celebrate our turkey day on Dauphin Island, which does set the scene for a nice if somewhat untraditional Thanksgiving. It was a balmy 75 degrees on the island and almost perfect for sipping cranberry juice cocktails on the deck--minus the cocktails part.

Friday, Nov. 26th--This day might be known as Black Friday to those who are unfortunate enough to live in other parts of the country. But here in Alabama--it's Iron Bowl Friday! We are a house divided, and like true fans neither of us will even consider crossing those party lines. (So lets stick with Troy University and Saints baby gear, please!)

Since I am no longer partaking in adult beverages, I decided to throw an Iron Bowl party. H refuses to watch football on anything less than our HDTV, and I figured if I can't go to the party, I should bring the party to me! Per the usual football-watching etiquette, each of my lovely friends brought a dish and we were ready to watch the showdown of the season. My Tigers are undefeated, and I had high hopes they could continue the streak even in Bryant-Denny Stadium. The game was awesome, or at least the second half was! Auburn pulled out a 28-27 victory and Cam Newton lived to spend another hard-earned dollar. Woo hoo!

There were no injuries, no fights, and only a few choice words were yelled at the television screen. Although H was not a happy camper in the end, thankfully he did not try to set my Auburn attire on fire this year--the bun in my oven is warm enough I guess!

I must admit I was a little bummed that I couldn't drink and get rowdy with all my friends, but I actually discovered a nice little surprise of forced sobriety. First of all, my friends are hilarious when they are slightly inebriated. As the sober girl at the party I was able to get a first-hand glimpse at how ridiculous and funny they are. It was great! Secondly, I felt like a million bucks Saturday morning while all of them were moaning and groaning and swearing they weren't going to drink like that again!

Overall it was a wonderful week for us. There isn't much better than hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time, watching Auburn win in a comeback of epic proportions, and spending time with friends and family. I am far more blessed than I probably deserve, but I am thankful for each and every moment of this grand life!

WDE!

TDC

Happy Birthday Nana!

Thursday, August 5th, 2010 marked the 90th birthday of H's grandmother. So on Saturday we gave her what all 90-year-old women truly want--a drunken party!

Okay, okay, we didn't really throw her a drunken party, you got me! We did, however, throw her a tasteful, delightful, completely appropriate birthday party suitable for a classy dame like Nana. As much as I would like to, I can't take all the credit. I really shouldn't even take part of the credit, but I'm an only child that loves personal recognition and praise--but at least I'm honest about it.

For a brief recap, the party was last Saturday at the home of some family friends. Somerby, Nana's very posh and upscale retirement community, unloaded a bus-load of senior citizens like an eager mom dropping her brood at daycare for the afternoon. And trust me when I tell you this group was ready to party!

Nana is one of the most amazing women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Not to sell my own grandmothers short (because they are pretty awesome themselves) but this post is about Nana's birthday so I shall honor her today. Her husband, H's grandfather, died twenty-something years ago. After his passing, Nana decided there was just no time like the present to really start living her life---so she packed a bag and took off looking for adventure. Beginning in her early sixties after Pop's death, Nana decided to travel the world--usually unaccompanied. Now some people might balk at that thought, but I think it sounds divine. She just went where she wanted to go and did what she wanted to do. There are pictures of her in well-known spots like Italy and London, Brazil and Japan. And there are some pictures of Nana in even more exotic locales--the pyramids of Egypt, a fish market in Thailand, on safari in Africa. Even at 90, she is ready to head out of here on the next thing smoking! (I'm not sure, but she may even have a bag packed in her hall closet--just in case.)

At my bridesmaid brunch the morning of my wedding, Nana gave a beautiful Irish toast that I will treasure forever. I felt it was a true welcoming into her clan--straight from the matriach and head of the family. It was on that day that I decided to be more like Nana. Embrace the adventure of the unknown! Don't be afraid to do something you've always wanted to do--even if it means doing it alone sometimes. Most of all, handle things with grace and confidence, and never let 'em see ya sweat. Last but not least, try to collect odds and ends from around the world that you can one day pass along to your grandson (and his lovely wife)--which is how we acquired a wooden carving of a big hand flipping someone the bird.

Last Saturday was one of those experiences where you set out to do something nice for someone else, then you realize in the end that you were the one that was truly blessed. My email-forwarding, digital camera-loving, twistedly humorous Nana-in-law did have a wonderful time celebrating with family and friends. She even shook her groove thang with an awfully handsome and dapper older gentleman.

And somewhere....deep down.....I crossed my fingers that their bus trip home was as wild and crazy as any Spring Break Party Bus rental in PCB ever thought about being!

Minus the stripper pole---she is our Nana for Pete's sake!